22 Times Doctors Were Very, Very Wrong

Cameron Fetter Published Yesterday in Funny

Doctors make mistakes, just like the rest of us. And sometimes those mistakes involve publicly endorsing fraudulent, bizarre, or downright dangerous medical products. They’re only human, after all! Whom among us hasn’t appeared in an advertisement for laudanum for infants and later regretted it?

Take a look at these vintage advertisements for medical treatments that time has revealed to be ineffective and hazardous. Be grateful that you now live in an age of medical marvels where your doctor is probably not going to recommend that you sit inside of a rotting whale carcass for two hours to cure joint inflammation. Probably.

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1.
In this 1959 advertisement, doctors recommend that housewives be prescribed Mornidine, better known under its generic name, Thalidomide. Thalidomide led to thousands of birth defects and infant deaths worldwide.
2.
‘Menthoids, the Great Blood Purifier’ sounds more like a terrible sci-fi B-movie than a legitimate medical treatment. But if Dr. Mackenzie endorses them, might as well give it a whirl! (1956)
3.
I’m glad I don’t live in a time when a cure for coughing has to explicitly advertise that it’s free from poison. (1886)
4.
This menacing-looking device from 1865 was said to fully restore eyesight and render glasses unnecessary. I don’t think I’m letting whatever that thing is anywhere near my eyes, not even with a money-back guarantee.
5.
A ‘health cigar’ seems like an oxymoron, but in 1930 Dr. Edward Roehrig claimed these cigars helped maintain physical fitness. Dr. Roehrig died of lung cancer in 1938.
6.
In the 1900s, doctors often prescribed tapeworms as a method of losing weight. (Advertisement from 1898)
7.
This 1890s ‘treatment’ involved wearing a vibrating electric belt until your system “becomes charged with reviving voltage.”
8.
When your doctor tries to get you to buy something called an ‘ozone generator’, it’s time to get a new doctor. (1928)
9.
A 1932 ad for radium face cream that was said to rejuvenate your skin. If there’s somewhere to put radioactive material, it’s definitely not your face.
10.
Doctors in 1885 swore by cocaine to cure everything from flatulence to mosquito bites. Seriously, imagine getting prescribed cocaine because you’re passing gas too much.
11.
This 1885 medical advertisement suggests that children suffering from toothaches should try cocaine drops. They only cost 15 cents!
12.
If you had rheumatoid arthritis in Australia in the early 1900s, you could cure it by visiting this ‘whale hotel’. The hotel? A decaying whale carcass with a hole cut into it that you’d lie inside of for two hours. This treatment was literally ‘discovered’ by a drunken man who accidentally fell into a decomposing whale.
13.
Professor Julius Wagner-Jauregg pioneered a treatment for muscle weakness that involved deliberately infecting the patient with malaria. And not only that, but he won a Nobel Prize for it in 1927.
14.
‘Mrs Winslow’s Soothing Syrup’ sounds like a great thing to give your baby, until you learn that it’s a mixture of morphine and alcohol. (1907)
15.
A 1923 medical advertisement selling cigarettes as a cure for asthma. It’s crazy to be so wrong that you land on the exact opposite.
16.
In the late 1800s, some doctors believed that milk was a perfect substitute for blood, and would do ‘milk transfusions’. This, unsurprisingly, often resulted in the patient’s death.
17.
Are dentists real doctors? Well, real enough to recommend that you smoke Viceroy cigarettes. It’s for your health. (1946)
18.
This doctor claims that Camel cigarettes will give your throat a vacation. (1931)
19.
This 1930s ad claims that Lucky Strike cigarettes will actually protect you from coughing and throat irritation. 20,679 doctors can’t be wrong!
20.
Doctors endorse Camels as a physician’s cigarette of choice in an ad in LIFE magazine from 1946.
21.
Quaaludes, originally prescribed as a sleep aid from 1962-1985, became a rampant street drug that led to mania, seizures, vomiting, and death. But look how happy the guy in this ad is!
22.
This advertisement is less of a doctor being wrong, and more of ‘why did you feel the need to endorse this?’ I guess in 1956 there might have been someone on the fence about what motor oil to buy, and was tipped over the edge by a medical endorsement.

1.
In this 1959 advertisement, doctors recommend that housewives be prescribed Mornidine, better known under its generic name, Thalidomide. Thalidomide led to thousands of birth defects and infant deaths worldwide.
2.
‘Menthoids, the Great Blood Purifier’ sounds more like a terrible sci-fi B-movie than a legitimate medical treatment. But if Dr. Mackenzie endorses them, might as well give it a whirl! (1956)
3.
I’m glad I don’t live in a time when a cure for coughing has to explicitly advertise that it’s free from poison. (1886)
4.
This menacing-looking device from 1865 was said to fully restore eyesight and render glasses unnecessary. I don’t think I’m letting whatever that thing is anywhere near my eyes, not even with a money-back guarantee.
5.
A ‘health cigar’ seems like an oxymoron, but in 1930 Dr. Edward Roehrig claimed these cigars helped maintain physical fitness. Dr. Roehrig died of lung cancer in 1938.
6.
In the 1900s, doctors often prescribed tapeworms as a method of losing weight. (Advertisement from 1898)
7.
This 1890s ‘treatment’ involved wearing a vibrating electric belt until your system “becomes charged with reviving voltage.”
8.
When your doctor tries to get you to buy something called an ‘ozone generator’, it’s time to get a new doctor. (1928)
9.
A 1932 ad for radium face cream that was said to rejuvenate your skin. If there’s somewhere to put radioactive material, it’s definitely not your face.
10.
Doctors in 1885 swore by cocaine to cure everything from flatulence to mosquito bites. Seriously, imagine getting prescribed cocaine because you’re passing gas too much.
11.
This 1885 medical advertisement suggests that children suffering from toothaches should try cocaine drops. They only cost 15 cents!
12.
If you had rheumatoid arthritis in Australia in the early 1900s, you could cure it by visiting this ‘whale hotel’. The hotel? A decaying whale carcass with a hole cut into it that you’d lie inside of for two hours. This treatment was literally ‘discovered’ by a drunken man who accidentally fell into a decomposing whale.
13.
Professor Julius Wagner-Jauregg pioneered a treatment for muscle weakness that involved deliberately infecting the patient with malaria. And not only that, but he won a Nobel Prize for it in 1927.
14.
‘Mrs Winslow’s Soothing Syrup’ sounds like a great thing to give your baby, until you learn that it’s a mixture of morphine and alcohol. (1907)
15.
A 1923 medical advertisement selling cigarettes as a cure for asthma. It’s crazy to be so wrong that you land on the exact opposite.
16.
In the late 1800s, some doctors believed that milk was a perfect substitute for blood, and would do ‘milk transfusions’. This, unsurprisingly, often resulted in the patient’s death.
17.
Are dentists real doctors? Well, real enough to recommend that you smoke Viceroy cigarettes. It’s for your health. (1946)
18.
This doctor claims that Camel cigarettes will give your throat a vacation. (1931)
19.
This 1930s ad claims that Lucky Strike cigarettes will actually protect you from coughing and throat irritation. 20,679 doctors can’t be wrong!
20.
Doctors endorse Camels as a physician’s cigarette of choice in an ad in LIFE magazine from 1946.
21.
Quaaludes, originally prescribed as a sleep aid from 1962-1985, became a rampant street drug that led to mania, seizures, vomiting, and death. But look how happy the guy in this ad is!
22.
This advertisement is less of a doctor being wrong, and more of ‘why did you feel the need to endorse this?’ I guess in 1956 there might have been someone on the fence about what motor oil to buy, and was tipped over the edge by a medical endorsement.

In this 1959 advertisement, doctors recommend that housewives be prescribed Mornidine, better known under its generic name, Thalidomide. Thalidomide led to thousands of birth defects and infant deaths worldwide.

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NEXT GALLERY 15 Best Jokes From Top Comedians Of The 1980s

1. In this 1959 advertisement, doctors recommend that housewives be prescribed Mornidine, better known under its generic name, Thalidomide. Thalidomide led to thousands of birth defects and infant deaths worldwide.

2. ‘Menthoids, the Great Blood Purifier’ sounds more like a terrible sci-fi B-movie than a legitimate medical treatment. But if Dr. Mackenzie endorses them, might as well give it a whirl! (1956)

3. I’m glad I don’t live in a time when a cure for coughing has to explicitly advertise that it’s free from poison. (1886)

4. This menacing-looking device from 1865 was said to fully restore eyesight and render glasses unnecessary. I don’t think I’m letting whatever that thing is anywhere near my eyes, not even with a money-back guarantee.

5. A ‘health cigar’ seems like an oxymoron, but in 1930 Dr. Edward Roehrig claimed these cigars helped maintain physical fitness. Dr. Roehrig died of lung cancer in 1938.

6. In the 1900s, doctors often prescribed tapeworms as a method of losing weight. (Advertisement from 1898)

7. This 1890s ‘treatment’ involved wearing a vibrating electric belt until your system “becomes charged with reviving voltage.”

8. When your doctor tries to get you to buy something called an ‘ozone generator’, it’s time to get a new doctor. (1928)

9. A 1932 ad for radium face cream that was said to rejuvenate your skin. If there’s somewhere to put radioactive material, it’s definitely not your face.

10. Doctors in 1885 swore by cocaine to cure everything from flatulence to mosquito bites. Seriously, imagine getting prescribed cocaine because you’re passing gas too much.

11. This 1885 medical advertisement suggests that children suffering from toothaches should try cocaine drops. They only cost 15 cents!

13. Professor Julius Wagner-Jauregg pioneered a treatment for muscle weakness that involved deliberately infecting the patient with malaria. And not only that, but he won a Nobel Prize for it in 1927.

14. ‘Mrs Winslow’s Soothing Syrup’ sounds like a great thing to give your baby, until you learn that it’s a mixture of morphine and alcohol. (1907)

15. A 1923 medical advertisement selling cigarettes as a cure for asthma. It’s crazy to be so wrong that you land on the exact opposite.

16. In the late 1800s, some doctors believed that milk was a perfect substitute for blood, and would do ‘milk transfusions’. This, unsurprisingly, often resulted in the patient’s death.

17. Are dentists real doctors? Well, real enough to recommend that you smoke Viceroy cigarettes. It’s for your health. (1946)

18. This doctor claims that Camel cigarettes will give your throat a vacation. (1931)

19. This 1930s ad claims that Lucky Strike cigarettes will actually protect you from coughing and throat irritation. 20,679 doctors can’t be wrong!

20. Doctors endorse Camels as a physician’s cigarette of choice in an ad in LIFE magazine from 1946.

21. Quaaludes, originally prescribed as a sleep aid from 1962-1985, became a rampant street drug that led to mania, seizures, vomiting, and death. But look how happy the guy in this ad is!

22. This advertisement is less of a doctor being wrong, and more of ‘why did you feel the need to endorse this?’ I guess in 1956 there might have been someone on the fence about what motor oil to buy, and was tipped over the edge by a medical endorsement.

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1.
In this 1959 advertisement, doctors recommend that housewives be prescribed Mornidine, better known under its generic name, Thalidomide. Thalidomide led to thousands of birth defects and infant deaths worldwide.

2.
‘Menthoids, the Great Blood Purifier’ sounds more like a terrible sci-fi B-movie than a legitimate medical treatment. But if Dr. Mackenzie endorses them, might as well give it a whirl! (1956)

3.
I’m glad I don’t live in a time when a cure for coughing has to explicitly advertise that it’s free from poison. (1886)

4.
This menacing-looking device from 1865 was said to fully restore eyesight and render glasses unnecessary. I don’t think I’m letting whatever that thing is anywhere near my eyes, not even with a money-back guarantee.

5.
A ‘health cigar’ seems like an oxymoron, but in 1930 Dr. Edward Roehrig claimed these cigars helped maintain physical fitness. Dr. Roehrig died of lung cancer in 1938.

6.
In the 1900s, doctors often prescribed tapeworms as a method of losing weight. (Advertisement from 1898)

7.
This 1890s ‘treatment’ involved wearing a vibrating electric belt until your system “becomes charged with reviving voltage.”

8.
When your doctor tries to get you to buy something called an ‘ozone generator’, it’s time to get a new doctor. (1928)

9.
A 1932 ad for radium face cream that was said to rejuvenate your skin. If there’s somewhere to put radioactive material, it’s definitely not your face.

10.
Doctors in 1885 swore by cocaine to cure everything from flatulence to mosquito bites. Seriously, imagine getting prescribed cocaine because you’re passing gas too much.

11.
This 1885 medical advertisement suggests that children suffering from toothaches should try cocaine drops. They only cost 15 cents!

13.
Professor Julius Wagner-Jauregg pioneered a treatment for muscle weakness that involved deliberately infecting the patient with malaria. And not only that, but he won a Nobel Prize for it in 1927.

14.
‘Mrs Winslow’s Soothing Syrup’ sounds like a great thing to give your baby, until you learn that it’s a mixture of morphine and alcohol. (1907)

15.
A 1923 medical advertisement selling cigarettes as a cure for asthma. It’s crazy to be so wrong that you land on the exact opposite.

16.
In the late 1800s, some doctors believed that milk was a perfect substitute for blood, and would do ‘milk transfusions’. This, unsurprisingly, often resulted in the patient’s death.

17.
Are dentists real doctors? Well, real enough to recommend that you smoke Viceroy cigarettes. It’s for your health. (1946)

18.
This doctor claims that Camel cigarettes will give your throat a vacation. (1931)

19.
This 1930s ad claims that Lucky Strike cigarettes will actually protect you from coughing and throat irritation. 20,679 doctors can’t be wrong!

20.
Doctors endorse Camels as a physician’s cigarette of choice in an ad in LIFE magazine from 1946.

21.
Quaaludes, originally prescribed as a sleep aid from 1962-1985, became a rampant street drug that led to mania, seizures, vomiting, and death. But look how happy the guy in this ad is!

22.
This advertisement is less of a doctor being wrong, and more of ‘why did you feel the need to endorse this?’ I guess in 1956 there might have been someone on the fence about what motor oil to buy, and was tipped over the edge by a medical endorsement.